So, Avery is my daughter. I remember being pregnant with her. I remember giving birth to her.
However, as much as I try to convince myself otherwise, she really doesn't look anything like me, and she certainly doesn't act like me. She's always on the go go go go (I used to sit in one place and stare at a blade of grass for hours as a child... seriously), she's super defiant and doesn't listen (I am extremely passive-agressive), she talks a LOT (talking too much makes me uncomfortable, I'm pretty introverted unless I'm drunk), she's blonde (Im half Greek). These are all Troy characteristics.
The only thing really I'll take credit for is her whining (I am a professional complainer) and her histrionic tendencies. Characteristics of which I am not the most proud. It's like Troy is so dominant that his genes punched all my cool genes in the face and they just backed off.
My husband is 6'4". Not to mention he's shorter than his two younger brothers and Dad. And Avery's TALL. 100th percentile friggen long limbs and thin tall. Like supermodel status. I think I'm jealous of my one and a half year old. Actually I know I am. And it's like she rubs it in my face, too. I'll offer her pasta and bread and cheese and all sorts of foods that have tormented me my whole life and she's just shakes her head and says, "ice, pweese". Classic skinny girl move. I truly feel like if I could eat ice instead of food, all my problems would be solved. Anyway, look how tall she is! (with her cell phone, of course.)
But I am honestly so thrilled she will never have to deal with weight issues. Or end up like this kid (he breaks it down at the end... pretty awesome):
Lord have mercy on that poor soul.... I'm talking about mr. gaga....
ReplyDeleteI won't lie. He's pretty fierce in that mickey shirt and those snaps and dance moves are truly frightening. {His mother needs to be slapped-sure, let your kid dance around in his undies all he wants snapping away, BUT DON'T VIDEO TAPE IT AND PUT IT ON YOUTUBE.
who allows the 7 year old's love handles hang out all over the internet while he sings in to a brown banana... reallly? this is hilarious! ps... i think on top of it all... his hair reminds me of donald trumP! yikes!
ReplyDeleteI started laughing even before I began reading; your title is TOO good!
ReplyDeleteI have the opposite problem. My oldest takes after my husband, and he's only 5'4", and the tallest in his immediate family. Kate is in the 3rd percentile for height, and is now getting asked if she is the twin of her younger sister!
I feel like a gave birth to my little brother and dad at times. Which is pretty weird but Jack got those genes hard. My oldest little brother looks like the milkman's child. You'd line up all of us sibs and it's like a game of "One Of These Things Is Not Like The Other". I suppose it's just luck of the draw. And I'm kind of pissed I didn't get the blonde hair of the family. I probably would have had way more dates in high school instead of the freaky deaky in the back of English class.
ReplyDelete*Instead of BEING the freaky deaky in the back of English class.
ReplyDeleteChels: Could you imagine if this was your son/family? Sad. But I guess weird kids have to come from somewhere...
ReplyDeleteAshlie: The Donald Trump comparison makes it SO MUCH WORSE! haha
bbcd mama: We should get our in-laws together and open a circus!
Amanda: ohhh... YOU were the freaky deaky in the back of English class! Nice to meet you! Seriously though, being blonde is overrated. I mean at least thats what I tell myself...
I read this post over an hour ago. I had to come back to tell you that I still have Lady GaGa stuck in my head. Thanks a lot little fat kid!
ReplyDeleteAnd can I take a moment to point out that the dad makes a brief appearances or two in his blue "tighty whities". OMG, ewwwwwww!
she got cell phone from you...............
ReplyDeletethat kid is *NEVER* gonna live this video down.
ReplyDeleteEver.
Just wait until he gets to high school.
O.o
Penelope is a little mini Shawn too. My grandma calls her Shawna because she looks so much like him. If I didn't see her come out of my body and not leave my sight for weeks, I would question my maternity as well. Her character is so Shawn. She is very strong willed...I tend to be a bit of a push over...
ReplyDeleteP.S. I have to admit I'm addicted to your blog. I'm not a stay at home mom but I'm with my sweet P 99% of the time. She comes to work with me every day but wednesday. I'm still nursing and my little spoiled thing has never taken the bottle so I don't get much of a break. Point is...I totally relate to so much of what you blog. I love my little one more than anything in the universe (i'm a little obsessed with her ;) ) but I have to admit, it is AMAZING when I just have 30 minutes to myself (even if it's to clean the kitchen...cook...do laundry...vacuum...anything really!!) Those moments are almost as priceless as my little one's AMAZING gutted giggle that makes my heart practically explode out of my chest
Liv: I saw that! Gross! I like the background commentary too...
ReplyDeleteMary Anne: Hi Mom!
McGriddle: I know! That's why it is SO mean for his parents to put it on Youtube! It's just cruel.
Gisella: I can't believe you still nurse and she has never taken the bottle!! WOW. Good for you, that is very admirable! Its so weird how we can be so enamored by someone and need to be away from it some desperately at times.. for example, I count down the minutes to her nap time, but can't wait for her to wake up when she does nap...? Its a feeling only a mom can understand!!
What a fabulous blog you have! And I have to admit, I am more than a little jealous that you are in fact Mrs. Beer.
ReplyDeleteMy child is the spitting image of my husband. But, I have to admit that's kind of what I wanted. He is way more entertaining in real life than I am too. I don't know what I would do with a boring kid (love them just the same of course, but you get my drift). I was a boring kid for sure. I do find myself trying really hard to see a shred of myself in her, but I haven't found it yet!
As for Mr. Gaga...I see a 99% chance that we will see him on American Idol one day in clothes that are too small and with his mom telling him how good he is the whole show. Let's just hope he leaves dear old dad and his undies at home.
Just found your sweet blog, I didn't know you blogged. I love the beers on top:) You are too cute!
ReplyDeleteJana: Isn't my name the coolest!? Seriously. Lucked out. And got a cute husband to boot! And, dude, American Idol is like my fave. Can we be best friends?
ReplyDeleteVicky: HI VICKY! <3