failed anorexia, relaxation, and a dirty joke

First, I know I have to change my page header... I know. I'm all over it next week.

So, not only did I eff up the BOD diet (see previous post) on account of my super duper husband's ridiculous steak chili with crazy good cornbread (from scratch- sexy.), but to make myself more disgusting, I realized, that at the end of my steamy caloric love affair, I had been dripping afore-mentioned chili upon my helpless 6 week old's bald head while I was gorging myself. He was laying on my lap as I was annihilating my first run-in with food in over 24 hours and the little guy didn't even flinch as the probably really hot amazingness pooled upon his perfect little forehead. He took one for the team, that baby-man. Love him.

 PS. Hate myself- I was thisclose to scooping the stew up with my bare hands and rubbing it all over my naked body. Like, eating it wasn't enough, I wanted to be "one" with the chili. 

Anyway. 

We all got a substantial break from Avery on Friday (thank you mother-in-law), much needed from both parties. I swear it's unhealthy to be around a two year old 24 hours a day for weeks at a time. And if you think that statement suggests a bad parent, you clearly have never been through "the twos" as a mom or dad. "The terrible twos" are legit. 

Regardless, the house goes into ultimate relaxation mode when our energetic little princess is gone. 

Exhibit A

Exhibit B (15 minutes later)

What else happened. Oh, today we went to Costco where we stocked up on groceries for the week while sampling the finest mini egg rolls and dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets  and heaping spoonfuls of Activia. Didnt think our experience could get any better until the grocery bagger lady warned me that my "meat box" (the box packed with all the chicken and pork and beef we will need for this week a year) was far too heavy for me to carry, and I would need my husbands help. 

 This fueled an entire car ride full of filthy jokes having to do with my "meat box"- my last input being so disgusting that it was no longer funny anymore.

BOD DIET UPDATE: Oh, I ate a hot dog today. It was unbelievableeeee.  Otherwise, I've been soooo good on my diet that everyone hates except my husband. Even passed out up Troy's caramelized brown sugar and banana pancakes this morning. All I had to eat yesterday was some vodka (I decided I needed alcohol to forget how hungry I was...) Go me.

I hope you and all your meat boxes had a great weekend!